SMS Jokes, funny text shares, Humor, Witty quotes - Page 11

International scientific Question
Q. On heating which Liquid becomes solid ?

China : no any such type  of answer found in books

UK : not found on net
US : meaningless question
France : don't know answer


A Student From I.I.N. Chennai branch :  DOSA

===

Very interesting & meaningful msg to share:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K LM N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is equal to:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then,

H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K ;
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11=98%

K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E ;
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5=96%

L+O+V+E;
12+15+22+5 = 54%

L+U+C+K ;
12+21+3+11 = 47%

None of them makes 100%. Then what makes 100%?

Is it Money? NO!

M+O+N+E+Y= 13+15+14+5+25=72%

Leadership? NO!

L+E+A+D+E+R+S+H+I+P= 12+5+1+4+5+18+19+8+9+16=97%

Every problem has a solution, only if we perhaps change our "ATTITUDE"...

A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E ;
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

It is therefore OUR ATTITUDE towards Life and Work that makes
OUR Life 100% Successful.

Amazing mathematics

Beautiful msg to share:
Do you agree that we have 26 alphabets in English, as given below

A = 1 ; B = 2 ; C = 3 ; D = 4 ;
E = 5 ; F = 6 ; G = 7 ; H = 8 ;
I = 9 ; J = 10 ; K = 11 ; L = 12 ;
M = 13 ; N = 14 ; O = 15 ; P = 16 ;
Q = 17 ; R = 18 ; S = 19 ; T = 20 ;
U = 21 ; V = 22 ; W = 23 ; X =24 ;
Y = 25 ; Z = 26.

With each alphabet getting a number, in chronological order, as above, study the following, and bring down the total to a single digit and see the result yourself

Hindu -
S  h  r  e  e   K  r  i  s  h  n  a
19+8+18+5+5+11+18+9+19+8+14+1=135=9

Muslim
M  o  h  a  m  m  e  d
13+15+8+1+13+13+5+4=72=9

Jain
M a  h a v  i  r
13+1+8+1+22+9+18=72=9

Sikh
G  u  r  u   N  a  n  a  k
7+21+18+21+14+1+14+1+11 =108 =9

Parsi
Z  a  r  a  t  h  u  s  t  r a
26+1+18+1+20+8+21+19+20+18+1=153=9

Buddhist
G  a   u  t  a  m
7+1+21+20+1+13=63=9

Christian
E  s   a  M  e  s  s  i   a  h
5+19+1+13+5+19+19+9+1+8=99=18=9

Each one ends with number  9  

THAT IS NATURE'S CREATION TO SHOW THAT GOD IS ONE !!!

====

Useful tips

SOMETHING YOU
           MIGHT HAVE NOT
           KNOWN And NEED
           TO KNOW !!

  Ants Problem:
       Ants hate Cucumbers.
       "KEEP the skin of
        Cucumbers near the
        Place where they are
        or at Ant Hole.

 To make the Mirror
        Shine:
        "Clean with Sprite"

 To remove Chewing
        Gum from Clothes:
        "Keep the Cloth in
        the Freezer for One
        Hour"

 To Whiten White
        Clothes:
        "Soak White Clothes
        in hot water with a
        Slice of Lemon for 10
        Minutes"

 To give a Shine to
        your Hair:
        "Add one Teaspoon
        of Vinegar to Hair,
        then wash Hair"

 To get maximum
        Juice out of Lemons:
        "Soak Lemons in Hot
        Water for One Hour,
        and then juice them"

 To avoid smell of
       Cabbage while
       cooking:
       "Keep a piece of
        Bread on the
        Cabbage in the
        Vessel while cooking"

 To remove Ink from
       Clothes:
       "Put Toothpaste
       on the Ink Spots
       generously and let it
       dry completely, then
       wash"

 To get rid of Mice or
       Rats:
       "Sprinkle Black
       Pepper in places
       where you find Mice &
       Rats. They will run
       away"

 Take Water Before
       Bedtime..
       "About 90% of Heart
       Attacks occur Early in
       the Morning & it can
       be reduced if one
       takes a Glass or two
       of Water before going
       to bed at Night"

 We Know Water is
       important but never
       knew about the
       Special Times one
       has to drink it.. !!

       Did you  ???

 Drinking Water at the
       Right Time
       Maximizes its
       effectiveness on the
       Human Body;

       1.  1 Glass of Water
              after waking up -
              helps to
              activate internal
              organs..

       2.  1 Glass of Water
              30 Minutes
              before a Meal -
              helps digestion..

       3.  1 Glass of Water
              before taking a
              Bath  - helps
              lower your blood
              pressure.

       4. 1 Glass of Water
              before going to
              Bed - avoids
              Stroke  or Heart
              Attack.

Chinese Proverb Says:
      'When someone
       shares something of
       value with you and
       you benefit from  it,
       You have a moral
       obligation to share it
       with others too.'

====
Age and Experience

A German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost.

Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly,

"Boy, that was one delicious panther!  I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...

This made me smile!

"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"

Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the
old dogs. Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

If you don't send this to five 'old' friends right away, there will be five fewer people laughing

=======
Shampoo and Dish Wash

A very IMP message, do not ignore: DO NOT SHAMPOO IN THE SHOWER. I don't know why I didn't figure this out sooner. We use shampoo in the shower and when we wash our hair the shampoo runs down our whole body. Printed clearly on the shampoo label is the warning, "for extra body and volume." No wonder we have been gaining weight.

We should get rid of shampoos and start using dish washing liquid.
Its label reads "dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove."
Follow this and stay slim and trim forever...😜
MSG FROM

Doctor Sundarlal Sharma
From Bhojpur IIN

===========
Click here for more such jokes collections

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

Someshwara Temple , Ulsoor - Bangalore - Must visit spot

On our search for old temples in Bengaluru , our team explored Sri Someshwara Temple at Ulsoor , one of the ancient and finest temple architectures  in Bengaluru city. In this post we present what our team captured at this must visit spot.

Sri Someshwara Temple Inside View

Gopuram Pigeons

It was a bright sunny day , our team took off from their expedition car and reached this spot by 10.30 AM. This temple is at Ulsoor ( which was also known as Halasuru meaning the place famous for Halasu in Kannada means Jack fruit ) which is around 5-6 kms from Bangalore center and has easy reach over Bengaluru Metro also.  We took the bazaar street road behind the MG One mall opposite to Taj Hotel , connecting to Indira Nagar double road. All shops were just open and the bazaar business was just starting up. Although there is no sufficient parking area here , we managed to get our car parked besides the temple compound wall. When we reached temple entrance we noticed the beautiful Gopuram which had 7 kalasa on it , accompanied by the Gopuram pillar - on which a majestic art work was carved - which clearly gave a glimpse how ancient this temple could be . Our curiosity was high at this point !!

Temple Inside Front View

After entering the temple , we entered the first sanctum where we noticed another pillar , Nandi and Deepam Stand where lights were lit. Interestingly we noticed , deepam was lit using Bitterguard shell with oil filled in it. There was no much crowd , thank god we could explore in detail !! Once we entered the main sanctum , we were mesmerized with the art work on the pillars inside the open mantapa which looked like a typical Vijayanagar Art style. We were greeted by another big Nandi Idol of about 3 feet hight enclosed with brass. The diety Someshwara Idol was little visible from this spot already. We entered the main sanctum where Priest was performing the pooja and distributing the theerta prasada. There were separate queues for Gents and Ladies to take darshan. Once we entered, a feel of satisfaction & peace occupied our minds looking at the idol of Someshwara Linga. Place was totally silent , peaceful with sun rays passing through the stone holes with a gentle air breeze. After submitting our prayers , we roamed around the temple campus - visited Parvathi , Hanuman , Naga temple besides Someshwara main sanctum.

Wall carvings 

History says this temple was constructed during the period of Cholas which was later renovated during the Vijayanagar rulers and later by Yelahanka Nada Prabhus including Kempegowda. Surrounded by this temple are trees of Shiv Ling flower , Sampige , Bilpatre which are considered to be favorite for Lord Shiva pooja. On the walls and gopuram of the mail sanctum , carvings depicting Hindu mythology were seen. This temple also participates in the Bengaluru Karaga festival.

Temple is open for darshan and pooja between 6 AM to 12 PM in the morning and at evening between 5.30 PM to 09 PM. This is one of the must visit spots in Bengaluru and definitely one will enjoy visiting here - which may be a planned trip along with friends and family.  Surrounded by this temple is MG road , Lido Mall , Gurudwara , IndiraNagar which are best places for shopping and Entertainment to make your visit still memorable. Do visit this spot and share your visit experiences.

Door carvings

Gopuram Outside View

Natya Ganapathi Idol

Naga Idols

Parvathi Temple 

Pillars Carvings

Inside Pillars carvings

Shiv Ling flower and Tree

Pillar Sculpture

Temple timings

Temple wall carvings

Wall carvings

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

Bellandur Lake - largest lake of Bengaluru

Our team happen to take a stroll to the largest lake in Bangalore city at present , the Bellandur Lake which is at the southern east part of the city. Covering with a surface area upto 3 kms its indefinitely one of the largest lakes.

Bellandur Lake - Nice view - Cranes on Lake

Once known for housing birds , different type of snakes , lizards and other unique species ,currently the lake is slowly getting contaminated and underutilized . One may only observe weeds all over the lake. If government plans to develop this lake  - it would definitely be a great spot for boating and water games activities. Government had once taken up the cleaning activity recently , but few small industries are still dumping the sewage which has disturbed the lake ecosystem. Below are few snaps taken for our readers to get a view of current status of this gigantic lake.

Panoramic View of Bellandur Lake - Northern & Middle part of the Lake

Panoramic View of Bellandur Lake - Southern & Middle part of the Lake

With many lakes getting diminished slowly & big buildings raising heads , the scenic beauty of our city too is getting  diminished . Time is not far when our children may have to travel far places to see a lake and enjoy its beauty - unless we civilians join hands in following up with government and getting the lakes cleaned - else one day it may just remain encroached !!

Bengalurians, those who are really interested in maintaining & preserving the beauty of our Bengaluru city and its nature should share this state of lake with your friends circles in Bangalore and raise with the concerned authority to get the lake cleaned and use for different useful purposes. 

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

Sri Varadanjaneya Temple , JP Nagar RBI Layout - Bangalore

Sri Varadanjaneya temple

 

 

On our search for old temples in Bangalore , our team recently visited Sri Varadanjaneya Temple which is at RBI Layout , JP Nagar.

As per history this temple has the idol which is believed to be established and devoted by sage Vyasaraja , Pratishtapitha Mukhya prana devaru. Sri Vyasaraja theertharu is a guru of the famous dasas - Sri Purandara dasa and Kanakadasa.He was also the Raja Guru at the court of Sri Krishnadevaraya. He had also installed 732 anjaneya idols which are self mainfested upon the drawing of Sri Vyasaraja theertharu. He is a well known saint of the Dwaita Philosophy and is said to be an avatara of Prahalad from Narasimha avatar.  Situated in the midst of JP Nagar 7th block RBI layout around 13kms from city center , this temple is surrounded by the residential layout and a park. The temple was renovated during 1982 when this layout was formed.

Sri Varadanjaneya Temple - Tulasi 

 

 

 

 

 

Our team visited on a early morning . From outset - temple seemed to be recently constructed . Entrance was straight forward and we could directly get a glimpse of the Idol. The Idol's outset clearly indicated it is existing since ages. Priest & Devotees believe it may be at-least 500 years old. Lord Hanuman is worshiped here under the name Varadanjaneya which means one who offers a boon and fulfills it. The idol has carving of Hanuman who is in standing position , with his face towards left and right hand over the head facing front with blessing / boon position which is unique. Temple attracts regular devotees who conduct Bhajans , prayers , programs here occasionally. It also houses a compound for Banayan tree and Tulasi plant which is worshiped by the community.

Temple is open between morning 7.00 AM to 10.30 AM and in the evening between 5.PM to 7.30 PM . Overall a nice spot to visit with your family on a weekend. There is lot for entertainment & shopping around to make your visit happier. Do share your visit experience.

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

SMS Jokes, funny text shares, Humor, Witty quotes - Page 10

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich bird behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?'

'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke'
The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same'
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again.

'The usual?' asks the waitress.
'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man.
'Same,' says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.'
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer.
"Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"

Says the man, "Well, several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. The first wish I asked was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."

The waitress said "That's brilliant! Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. How smart of you!''

"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there" says the man proudly.

The waitress asks, "But, what's that ostrich all about?"

The man sighs, pauses and answers with a heavy heart, "My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who accompanies me wherever I go and agrees with everything I say".

MORAL OF THE STORY: Men's brains work brilliant until they start thinking about a woman!!
===================================
Swami Vivekanand

When Swami Vivekanand was studying law at the University College, London, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room when  came along with his tray and sat next to the professor.

The professor said, "Mr Vivekanand , you do not understand. A pig and a bird do not sit together to eat."

Vivekanandji looked at him as a parent would a rude child and calmly replied, "You do not worry professor. I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table.

Mr. Peters,  reddened with rage, decided to take revenge.

The next day in Class he posed the following question: "Mr.Vivekanand , if you were walking down the street and found a package, and within was a bag of wisdom and another bag with money, which one would you take ?"

Without hesitating, Vivekanandji responded, "The one with the money, of course."

Mr. Peters , smiling sarcastically said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom."

Swami Vivekanand shrugged and responded, "Each one takes what he doesn't have."

Mr. Peters, by this time was fit to be tied. So great was his anger that he wrote on Swami Vivekanand's exam sheet the word "idiot" and gave it to Swami Vivekanand.

Vivekanandji took the exam sheet and sat down at his desk trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

A  few  minutes later, Swami Vivekanand got up, went to the professor and told him in a dignified polite tone, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade."

=========================

Teacher at class:"suno bachcho kal tum
logo ka group photo shoot hoga,, . Sab log
apne apne ghar se Rs.50/-le kar aana,,
.
.
Naughty Kid: "Ye sab teacher logo ki mili
bhagat hoti hai,,
Ek photo k 20/- rupye lagte hai aur hum
logo se 50_50 rupye liye ja rahe hai,, .
Matlab ek bachche se 30/- Rupeye bachayenge matlab akele apni class me 60
bachche hai to 60*30=1800 Rs. . khuli Loot
macha rakhi hai in logo ne,,
..
Fir hamare paiso se ye sab staff room me
baith k samosa khayenge aur hum bachchon ko milega Thenga .
Bhalai ka to zamaana hi nahi rah gaya,,
.
.
Naughty Kid to mom: "Mummy kal school me
group photo shoot hona hai teacher ne
Rs.100/- rupye mangaye hai..
.
. Mom: 100 rs!!
khuli loot macha rakhi hai in logo ne,,
..
Fir hamare paiso se ye sab eish karenge...
ruk beta mei tere pappa se mangti
hu...
MOM TO DAD:
are sunte ho
Bache ke school mein group photos ke liye
rs.200 mange hai!!''

This is how inflation occurs.

==================================

Beggar - Give me food.
Man - I'll give u vodka.
Beggar - i don't drink.
Man - i will give u cigarette.
Beggar - i don't smoke.
Man - i will take u to d races.
Beggar - i don't gamble.
Man - i will get u a girlfriend.
Beggar - no i only love my wife.
Man - i'll give u food, but first u have to come to my house.
Beggar - why?
Man - i want my wife to see what state people get into when they don't drink, smoke, gamble and only love their wife..

=================================

Mark Zuckerberg's wife is the only wife in the world who says "dear, you focus only on facebook & whatsapp, i'll handle the rest"...

=================================

In the class the teacher said: "the first person to answer my question will go home early".
sardar threw his bag outside.
Teacher asked: "Whose bag is that???"
Sardar answered: "It's mine.... bye bye!"
Sardar is getting smarter day by day..

=================================

YOUR PHONE NUMBER. WILL REVEAL YOUR AGE.

AMAZING -AMAZING-AMAZING

Your Phone number will reveal your actual Age.
I do not know who discovered this?
but it is...Really accurate.
It will take about 15 seconds,
read and do it at the same time so that you will not lose the fun.
1- Take a look at your last digit of your cell phone number
2- Use this figure and multiply by 2
3- Then add 5
4- And then multiply by 50
5-And then add the number 1764
6- The last step; with this number, subtract your birth year.
Now you see a three-digits number.
The first digit is the last digit of your phone number, the next two digits are your actual age!
IS'NT THIS SURPRISING?
Try it...
Really amazing

====================================


Teacher: 5 - 5 = how much?
Student is quiet…..
Teacher tries again: agar tere paas 5 idli hai  aur main tere 5 idli le lu, tere paas kya bachega?


Student: sambar aur chutney...

====================================
Interesting Facts :
You can only dream about faces you have already seen. Your brain cannot make up new ones when you're dreaming.
The harder you concentrate on falling asleep, the less likely it will happen.
There is no word you can write using only the bottom row of the keyboard.
The human mind spends 70% of it's time replaying memories & creating scenarios of perfect moments and situations.
Don't use a song you like as an alarm to wake up. You'll end up hating it.
Laughing for 15 minutes benefits the human body the same as sleeping for 2 hours.
When you wake up around 2-3 am without any reasons, there's an 80% chance someone is remembering you.
After an argument, more than 85% people tend to think of all the clever things they should have said.
Listening to music has been shown to lower stress levels, lower blood pressure, increase concentration and even relieve pain.
A “moment” technically means 90 seconds.
Chocolate is about five times more effective than cough syrup when suffering from the common cold.
No matter how hard you try, you can never remember how your dream started.
There's a 96% chance at this very moment you are waiting for something that will never happen.
Emotional pain lasts for 10 to 20 minutes, anything longer is actually self inflicted by over thinking, making things worse.
You see yourselves 5 times more attractive in the mirror than you really are, thanks to your brain.
99% people get scared when a text reads "can i ask you a question."
==========================================
Click here for more such jokes collections

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

Akshaya tritiya Importance - Kannada article share - ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ

'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ'. ಹಿಂದೂ ಧರ್ಮದಲ್ಲಿ ಈ ದಿನಕ್ಕೆ ವಿಶೇಷ ಮಹತ್ವವಿದೆ. ಅವುಗಳೆಂದರೆ: -

1) ನಾಲ್ಕು ಯುಗಗಳಾದ ಸತ್ಯ, ತ್ರೇತಾ, ದ್ವಾಪರ ಮತ್ತು ಕಲಿಯುಗಗಳಲ್ಲಿ, ಸತ್ಯ ಅಥವಾ ಕೃತಯುಗ ಪ್ರಾರಂಭವಾಗಿದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

2) ವೇದವ್ಯಾಸರು ಮಹಾಭಾರತವನ್ನು ರಚಿಸುವ ಸಂದರ್ಭದಲ್ಲಿ ಅವರಿಗೆ ಸಹಾಯಕನಾಗಿ ಗಣೇಶನು ನೆರವಾಗಿದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

3) ಭಗೀರಥನ ಪ್ರಯತ್ನದಿಂದ ಗಂಗಾವತರಣವಾಗಿದ್ದು (ಶಿವನ ಜಟೆಯಿಂದ ಗಂಗೆ ಭೂಮಿಗೆ ಇಳಿದದ್ದು) 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

4) ದಶಾವತಾರಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಒಂದಾದ 'ಪರಶುರಾಮಾವತಾರ' ಪ್ರಾರಂಭವಾಗಿದ್ದು (ಹುಟ್ಟಿದ ದಿನ) 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

5) ಸಂಪತ್ತಿನ ಒಡೆಯ ಮತ್ತು ಯಕ್ಷರ ರಾಜ 'ಕುಬೇರ'ನಿಗೆ ನಿಧಿ/ಸಂಪತ್ತು ದೊರೆತದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

6) ಕುಚೇಲನಿಗೆ ಗೆಳೆಯ ಶ್ರೀಕೃಷ್ಣನಿಂದ ಅನುಗ್ರಹ ಪ್ರಾಪ್ತಿಯಾಗಿದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

7) ಅಮೃತ ಪ್ರಾಪ್ತಿಗಾಗಿ ದೇವತೆಗಳು ಮತ್ತು ರಾಕ್ಷಸರು ಸಮುದ್ರ ಮಂಥನ ಮಾಡುತ್ತಿದ್ದ ವೇಳೆ ಲಕ್ಷ್ಮೀ ಹುಟ್ಟಿದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

8) ದುಶ್ಯಾಸನನು ದ್ರೌಪದಿಯ ವಸ್ತ್ರಾಪಹರಣ ಮಾಡುತ್ತಿದ್ದ ವೇಳೆ ಶ್ರೀಕೃಷ್ಣನು ಆಕೆಯ ಮಾನವನ್ನು (ಸೀರೆಯನ್ನು ನೀಡುವುದರ ಮೂಲಕ) ಕಾಪಾಡಿದ್ದು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು.

ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ ದಿನದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಇವಿಷ್ಟು ಪುರಾಣದ ಸಂಗತಿಗಳಾದರೆ, ನಾವಿರುವ ಕಲಿಯುಗದಲ್ಲಿ ಈ ಕೆಳಗಿನ ಸಂಗತಿಗಳು ಈ ರೀತಿ ಇವೆ:

1) ಆಂಧ್ರಪ್ರದೇಶದ ವಿಶಾಖಾಪಟ್ಟಣಂ ಬಳಿ ಇರುವ ಸಿಂಹಾದ್ರಿ ಅಥವಾ ಸಿಂಹಾಚಲಂ ದೇವಾಲಯದಲ್ಲಿ (ಹಿರಣ್ಯಕಶಿಪುವನ್ನು ಮಹಾವಿಷ್ಣುವು 'ನರಸಿಂಹಾವತಾರ'ದಲ್ಲಿ ಸಂಹರಿಸಿದ ಸ್ಥಳ) ವರ್ಷದ 364 ದಿನಗಳ ಕಾಲವೂ ಮೂಲದೇವರಾದ ನರಸಿಂಹಸ್ವಾಮಿಯ ಮುಖವನ್ನು ಚಂದನದಿಂದ ಮರೆಮಾಡಿರುತ್ತಾರೆ. ಕಾರಣ ನರಸಿಂಹಸ್ವಾಮಿಯ ಅತಿ ಉಗ್ರಸ್ವರೂಪ ಮೂರ್ತಿಯನ್ನು ನೋಡಲಾಗುವುದಿಲ್ಲ. ಆ.ದ.ರೆ.... 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು ಮಾತ್ರ ದೇವರ ಮುಖವನ್ನು ಚಂದನದಿಂದ ಮರೆಮಾಚದೇ ನೈಜ ದರ್ಶಕಕ್ಕೆ ಅವಕಾಶವಿರುತ್ತದೆ. ಹೀಗಾಗಿ ಅಂದು ಬಹುತೇಕ ಆಂಧ್ರಪ್ರದೇಶ ಮತ್ತು ಇನ್ನೀತರ ಭಾಗದ ಜನರು ಅಲ್ಲಿ ನೆರೆದಿರುತ್ತಾರೆ.

2) 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು ತಮ್ಮ ಸಾಮರ್ಥ್ಯಾನುಸಾರ ಹೋಮವನ್ನು ನೇರವೇರಿಸಿದ್ದಲ್ಲಿ ಅಥವಾ ಸಾರ್ವಜನಿಕವಾಗಿ ಹೋಮ ಆಯೋಜಿಸಿದ ಸ್ಥಳದಲ್ಲಿ ಭಾಗವಹಿಸಿದರೆ "ಅಶ್ವಮೇಘ" ಯಾಗ ಮಾಡಿದ ಪುಣ್ಯಪ್ರಾಪ್ತಿಯಾಗುತ್ತದೆ.

3) 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದಂದು ತಮ್ಮ ಶಕ್ತ್ಯಾನುಸಾರ ಯಾವುದೇ ಹೊಸ ವಸ್ತುಗಳನ್ನು ಖರೀದಿಸಬಹುದಾಗಿದೆ. (ಧನಿಕರು ಮತ್ತು ಅನುಕೂಲಸ್ಥರು ಚಿನ್ನವನ್ನು ಖರೀದಿಸಬಹುದು, ಆದರೆ ಕಡ್ಡಯವಲ್ಲ) ಏನೂ ಬೇಡವೆಂದರೂ ಅಡಿಗೆಗೆ ಬಳಸುವ ಉಪ್ಪಿನ ಪ್ಯಾಕೇಟನ್ನಾದರೂ ಖರೀದಿಸಿದರೆ ಚಿನ್ನವನ್ನು ಖರೀದಿಸಿದ ಫಲವೇ ಪ್ರಾಪ್ತಿಯಾಗುತ್ತದೆ.

4) 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದ ಇಡೀ ದಿನದ ಪ್ರತಿಯೊಂದು ಘಳಿಗೆಯೂ ಶುಭ ಮುಹೂರ್ತದ್ದೇ ಆಗಿರುತ್ತದೆ. ಅಂದು ಮಾತ್ರ ಯಾವುದೇ ರಾಹುಕಾಲ, ಗುಳಿಕಕಾಲ ಅಥವಾ ಇನ್ಯಾವುದೇ ಅಶುಭಕಾಲದ ಮಹತ್ವ ಇರುವುದಿಲ್ಲ.

ಈ ಮೇಲ್ಕಂಡ ವಿಷಯಗಳು 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದ' ಮಹತ್ವವನ್ನು ಪಡೆದುಕೊಂಡಿದೆ. ಅದು ಬಿಟ್ಟು ಕೇವಲ ಚಿನ್ನವನ್ನು ಖರೀದಿಸಿದರೇ ಮಾತ್ರ 'ಅಕ್ಷಯ ತೃತೀಯ' ದಿನದ ಫಲಪ್ರಾಪ್ತಿ ಎಂದು ನಂಬುವುದು ಶುದ್ಧ ಮೂರ್ಖತನ ಅಥವಾ ಹುಚ್ಚುತನ.  ಜನರ ಈ ಅಂಧಶ್ರದ್ಧೆಯ ಮನ:ಸ್ಥಿತಿಯನ್ನು ಚಿನ್ನದ ವ್ಯಾಪಾರಿಗಳು ಯಥೇಚ್ಛವಾಗಿ ಲಾಭವಾಗಿ ಪಡೆಯುತ್ತಿದ್ದಾರಷ್ಟೆ

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

A Khatha B Khatha for Bangalore property - Why need it

In Bengaluru real estate , for the past few years you would have kept hearing about A Khatha , B Khatha. Recently even High court had took a decision to convert all 'B' Khatha property to 'A' Khatha. Based on government rules and regulations Khatha will be provided in Bangalore to the property owner by the

BBMP (Bruhat Bangalore MahaNagara Palike) , BDA (Bangalore Development Authority) or BMRDA (Bangalore Mahanagara Rural Development Authority) . Until the government sends out specific instructions , officials say the  existing process for Khatha distribution shall continue. In this article , we present a brief information about Khatha , what it means , why is it required and its significance. Hope it helps to property buyers in Bengaluru.

What is Khatha ? Why is it required ?

In Kannada Khatha means an Account - and it really is a account. An account is created by the district authority for property owners and is used for maintaining and tracking Tax deposits and payments. In reality under Karnataka Municipality Council (KMC) rules there is no separate definition for Khatha - but for granting certain permissions for building & development activities it is required. It has the details of the proerty's owner , address/location , dimensions. It is a necessary document if one has to get a Bank Loan , to take licence for Electricity , Water , for resale etc. In Bengaluru , Khatha documents are maintained and tracked by BBMP.

What should I do to get Khatha is A Khatha & B Khatha ?

In reality there is no separate category for a Khatha document. All necessary details about a property are recorded in a single Khatha by BBMP. A owner who has a Khatha will be eligible to avail different legal services.   If properties sold by BDA and Karnataka Housing Board (KHB) - on producing documents such as Sale deed, Tax paid receipt , Encumbrance Certificate , Property Map - one can approach BBMP office and request for Khatha registration.
If it is revenue layouts, Gramtana , Apartments - one may have to produce Sale deed , details of old sale agreements if any , Land conversion documents, Development Tax receipts , previous Khatha documents , Property Map.

For any property layouts / buildings developed violating BBMP/BDA/BMRDA rules and regulations , Khatha will not be given. 

In 2007 - BBMP was formed handling the constituencies of Bommanahalli, DaasaraHalli,KrishnaRajapura , RajarajeshwariNagar , Mahadevapura, Byataraayanapura , Yelahanka and Kengeri. The property documents of these constituencies were not managed properly.  Without the the permission of development authorities , for revenue property and for those without land conversion - to register the details of such property and manage taxes a 'B' register was opened and their details were recorded. Property in B register has no legal considerations and for development activities - permissions may not be given and banks may not approve for loans. To regularize Kthata for such properties , development authorities are waiting for the government policy of Akrama - Sakrama.

What do KMC 108A(3) and 114 rules say ?

KMC 108A says for those property which are not as per KMC rules and regulations - without giving Khatha with the only intention to collect Taxes - a separate register has to be used. If the property owner dies or distributes the property to assist registration KMC rule 114 is formed. It is clearly indicated that for properties coming under 108A(3) , rule 114 is not applicable.

Can one purchase properties registered in 'B' register ?

For property registered under 'B' register , at present government does not honor any legal aspects. So if you really know the end party well and with very few banks giving loans , one may attempt at their own risk.

What is the importance of Sale deed then with respect to Khatha?

There is a difference in registering Khatha and Sale deed. Sale deed is only a deed between the two parties who sell & buy property and is essential to prove the ownership of the property. While Khatha is purely a method for collecting Taxes - but for every aspect of property selling , buying & distribution it is required & validated.

When does the Akrama Sakrama Policy get affected ?

Government had already passed this long time back. But considering that more than 2 lakh such properties existing with city already expanded - if regulation violation is still legally scrutinized it may create further problems , with  public interest - some people had written a letter to High court . Hence the policy execution could not move in the ideal way expected and BBMP is further waiting for government's decisions. More details on this available at BBMP link - http://bbmp.gov.in/akrama-sakrama

Also , check out our other articles on Bangalore property

• Before buying an Apartment or Independent house
• Before going for a rented or lease property

** Referred from different sources

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

BettaDaasanaPura ThimmarayaSwamy ancient temple

Exploring old historic spots in Bangalore , our team recently visited ThimmaraayaSwamy temple at BettaDaasanaPura - a village in Bangalore south. This is located at 20 kms from Bangalore center.

Fort remains

Temple front view

 

This temple is believed to be existing since more than around 1500 years and is believed to be established by Sage Gauthama who had performed penance here. Temple is on top of the small hill , which was earlier surrounded by a fort during the reign of the kings. Now these forts are devastated and only few parts remain. The priest whose family is serving from ages say - Kings used to visit this temple and their servants used to guard the forts.

Hill top view

 

 Idols of Lord Srinivasa (Thimmaraya Swamy) , Lakshmi , Padmavathi , Ganapathi , Kashi Vishwanatha , Parvathi are present here. For most of the people in the surrounding 21 villages Lord Srinivasa is the deity worshiped here.   Betta means Hill and Daasa means devotee . So its believed , there were many devotees visiting this temple earlier which later led to the village name as BettaDaasanaPura.

Rock View

Temple is recently renovated with the new structure , however the main chamber is still supported by stone pillars. There is also a small kalyani beside the temple top hill , where water is always available which is very strange says the priest as there is no source of water even bore-wells till 1000 ft depth in surrounding areas.

Kalyani

Temple is not usually crowded and is open 3 times in a week for darshan especially on Saturdays and Sundays between morning 7 to 12 PM and evening between 4.30 to 6.30 PM . One may get a good view of Electronic City and other surroundings from this temple top hill.

A very nice & cool destination to visit with friends and family . Do visit this place and share your visit experiences.

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

PanchaLingeshwara Temple , Begur

Searching for old historic spots in Bangalore , our team recently visited the Pancha Lingeshwara temple at Begur , Bangalore.  This temple is in the center of the Begur town , around 16 kms from Bangalore center.

Sri PanchaLingeshwara Nageshwara Temple  , Begur

Gopurams

Sculpture Carvings

This temple is believed to be existing since around 1200 years since the rule of Gangas, being developed during the period of cholas. The temple houses 5 lingaas (The symbol of Lord Shiva) -
1) Nagareshwara
2) Parvathi Nageshwara
3) Choleshwara
4) Karneshwara
5) Kaalikamateshwara
and hence the name Pancha Lingeshwara (Pancha meaning 5) temple.

Nandi Idol

Nagareshwara temple

This temple is surrounded with 3 big gopurams which seemed to be renovated recently . On entering the temple , we noticed beautiful sculptures carved on stones. There were also scriptures carved on stone blocks which seem to be belonging during cholas period. The Stone pillars are beautifully engraved with circular discs in the middle - which clearly reminded on the glory of our past kings . The height of the temple roof seemed to be around 6 feet , so tall people have to mind their head carefully while passing through this temple and the main chamber. From the temple outset , it resembled the structure of Hampi. All over the temple , sculptures depicting panchatantra are carved.

Procession idol

Outer View

There is good transport facility from all parts of the city to this destination. Temple is open for darshan from morning 6 AM till 12.00 PM and later in the evening between 5 to 8 PM. Although the main roads here are very narrow may be only around 20 feet , around this temple there is a good parking space.

Begur Lake

A very nice destination to visit with friends and family . Do visit this place and share your visit experiences.

Check out our touring spots guide for more details on other spots.

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

Donate old Newspapers , Be Social , Help Kidney patients

Dear Reader , nowadays we may have noticed patients suffering from Kidney related problems which require regular dialysis at medical centers . These checkups may be affordable to many , but some poor people still find it to difficult to get this treated due to their financial status. In few cases they manage to reach government hospitals where they get treated at a lesser cost.


As we all know - in Bangalore , practically there are very less centres offering free medical treatment and especially to kidney related issues it is still scarce. So how should poor people below poverty line afford to such treatments ? One of the organisation in Bangalore had the same question and have started a step to provide a lending hand to the poor.

"Arpana Foundation" in Bangalore , have started a unique service which not only helps you to clear off some old stuffs from your home , but also get awareness on kidney related issues and makes you contribute a small penny towards helping poor. Here is how the concept works

• This foundation collects old news papers from you
• You just need to call their number and they come to your doorstep and collect the papers. Isint it that simple , even old paper mart shop keepers don't have such service !
• The collected newspaper are then sold to marts and the money collected is shared within government hospitals network for free kidney dialysis 
• Not only they collect the papers , they also educate during their visit with short awareness program on kidney related disorders and precautions to avoid them. 

Many people in Bangalore are already lending their hand and contributing to this organization. We wish every Bengalurian to come forward and participate actively in this noble move which not only comes at free service but also , helps in keeping your store clean and at the same time a feel of helping others which never dies !!

Organization representatives may be contacted   at this no - +91 9845201563

So what are you waiting for . Dial the above number and get your old newspapers flushed off !!  If you are 

• Working - share this with your Store Administrator & colleagues
• At home - Share this with your neighbors & society centers.
• At a party with friends & family - Share with them.

** This was a published article in one of the kannada news daily . We have shared here to help the message reach to our blog readers.  **

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

SMS jokes , funny texts , Quotes , Humor , Stories - Page 9

Ego

Once there was an island where all the feelings lived together. One day there came a storm in the sea and the island was about to drown .Every feeling was scared but Love made a boat to escape. All the feelings jumped in the boat except for one feeling. Love got down to see who it was...it was Ego! Love tried & tried but Ego didn't move. Everyone asked Love to leave Ego & come in the boat but Love was meant to Love. It remained with Ego. All other feelings were left alive but Love died because of Ego!!

============================

Wife: Where are you?
Husband : At home love.
Wife: Are you sure?
Husband: Yes.
Wife : Turn on the mixer.
Husband : (turns mixer on) Rrrreeereeeereeee...
Wife: Ok my love goodbye.

Another day......
Suspicious Wife: Where are you?
Husband : At home love. Wife: Are you sure?
Husband : Yes.
Wife: Turn on the mixer.
Husband: (turns mixer on) Rrreeereeeereeee...
Wife: Ok my love goodbye.

The next day, the wife decides to go home without notice, and finds her son alone and she asks him, "Son, where is your father?"

Son: "I don't know, he went out with the mixer..

=================================================================
A German once visited a temple under
construction where he saw a sculptor making an idol of God...

Suddenly he noticed a similar idol lying nearby...
Surprised, he asked the sculptor, "Do you
need two statues of the same idol?"
"No," said the sculptor
without looking up, "We need only one, but the first one got damaged at the last stage..."

The gentleman
examined the idol and found no apparent damage...

"Where is the damage?" he asked.
"There is a scratch on the nose of the idol." said the sculptor, still
busy with his work....

"Where are you going to install the idol?"

The sculptor replied that it would be
installed on a
pillar twenty feet high...

"If the idol is that far who is going to know that there is a scratch on the nose?"
the gentleman asked.

The sculptor stopped work, looked up at the gentleman, smiled and said,

"I will know it..."

The desire to excel is exclusive of the fact whether someone else appreciates it or not....

"Excellence" is a
drive from inside, not outside....

Excellence is not for
someone else to notice but for your own satisfaction and efficiency.

Don't Climb a Mountain with an Intention that the World Should See You,
Climb the Mountain with the Intention to See the World


==================================

Father is flying a kite. His son is watching him carefully. After some time son says " Dad. Because of the string the kite is not able to go any further higher. "
Hearing this, the father smiles and breaks the string.
The kite goes higher after breaking of the thread and then shortly after that it comes and falls on the ground.
The child is very dejected and sad.

The father sits next to him and calmly expalains
" Son, in life we reach a certain level of prosperity and then we feel that there are certain things in our life that are not letting us grow any further like Home, Family, Culture Friendship etc. We feel we want to be free from those strings which we believe are stopping us from going higher.
But, remember son. Going higher is easier than staying at the higher level.
And friends, family and culture etc are the things that will help us stay stable at the high heights that we have achieved. If we try to break away from those strings our condition will be similar to the kite."
Moral
" never go away from culture, family, friends and relationships as they help keep you stable while you are flying high."


===================================

The ultimate & the most encouraging
lesson in English Grammar:-

‘If more than one mouse is mice,
then more than one Spouse is Spice !!!!

===================================

Donkey logic .....Equations! - This is the best
I have read in a LONG time !!!!


Equation1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy

 Donkey = eat + sleep + work

Therefore:
Human = Donkey + enjoy

Therefore:
Human-enjoy = Donkey

 In other words,
 A Human that doesn't know how to enjoy = Donkey that works.


 Equation 2

 Man = eat + sleep + earn money
 Donkey = eat + sleep

 Therefore:
 Man = Donkey + earn money

Therefore:
 Man-earn money = Donkey

 In other words
 Man who doesn't earn money = Donkey

 Woman= eat + sleep + spend
 Donkey = eat + sleep

 Therefore:
 Woman = Donkey + spend
 Woman - spend = Donkey

 In other words,
 Woman who doesn't spend = Donkey

 To Conclude:
 From Equation 2 and Equation 3

 Man who doesn't earn money = Woman who doesn't spend

 So Man earns money not to let woman become a donkey!
 And a woman spends not to let the man become a donkey!

 So, We have:
 Man + Woman = Donkey + earn money + Donkey + Spend money

 Therefore
 from postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude


 Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!

============================

In Japan, in a soap manufacturing company the soap blocks were made,
then wrapped in a wrapping paper automatically on an assembly conveyer belt
and finally packed in cartons...

Many a times it happened that the wrapping machine wrapped the paper without soap. i.e. you had an empty packet without soap.

To rectify this problem the Japanese company bought a X-ray scanner from the US for $60,000 to check on the  assembly line whether the container contained soap and wasn't empty.


A similar problem happened at Nirma soaps, in Ahmedabad in INDIA.. Guess what they did????

They bought a bajaj fan costing around Rs.1500/- and placed it on the edge of the assembly line.
The empty wrappers, without soaps just blew away!!!

===============================
Click here for more such jokes collections

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail

SMS Jokes , Witty quotes , stories , funny shares texts - Page 8

Son : Dad , There is a small get together in the school tomorrow. Please come
Dad : What do you mean by small , who all will be there ??
Son : Only you , me and principal !!

============================
A man approaches a beautiful woman in a Shopping Mall
"Miss, please, I lost my wife in the store. Would you mind if I talk to you for a few minutes?"
"Why?"
"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears from somewhere"!
============================
Witty quote :
If you salute your work, you dont have to salute anybody. If you pollute your work,  you have to sallute everybody - APJ Abdul Kalam
============================
What is the difference between farmers and husbands?
Farmers have agri_culture... Husbands have agree_culture
=======================================

Equality

It was a Sports Stadium...
8 boys were standing  on a track for racing.
Ready !
Steady !
Bang !
With sound of Pistol all boys started running.
Hardly  had they covered 10 to 15 steps,
1 boy slipped & fell.
He started crying due to pain.
When other 7 Boys heard him, all of them STOPPED running..
STOOD for a while,
turned BACK & RAN
towards him.
All the 7 Boys LIFTED the Boy,
pacified him,
joined hands together,
walked together &
reached WINNING Post.
Officials were shocked.
Many Eyes were filled with tears.
It happened at Pune. Race was conducted by National Institute of Mental Health...
All participants were
Mentally RETARDED.
What did they teach ?
Teamwork,
Humanity,
Sportsman spirit,
Love,
Care,
&
Equality..

We Surely can NEVER Do this,

because...

We have Brains....
We have Ego...
We have Attitude

============================
Nalia Bhatt Jokes !!

Nalia Bhatt - Safola oil toh de diya bhaiya. Is kee sath ka gift nahi diya.
Shopkeeper -  Isske sath koyi gift nahi hai.
Nalia - Ullu matt banao isme likha hai "Cholesterol Free"
Varun - How many apples can you eat on an empty stomach?
Aliya - I can eat 6 apples.
Varun - Wrong. you can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach bcoz when you eat the 2nd apple that’s not an empty stomach!
Aliya: Wow superb joke. I’ll tell my friend..
Aliya to Shraddha - How many apples you can eat on an empty stomach?
Shraddha - I can eat 10.
Aliya - Pagal.. 6 bolti to mast joke sunati!!

Nalia Bhatt calls the Help Desk to complain a computer problem.
Nalia - When I type computer password, it just shows star star star star. What's the problem?
Help Desk - Dear lady, those stars are to protect you, so that if a person is standing behind, he can't read your password.
Nalia - Yeah, but stars appear even when there is no one standing behind me.
Help Desk - !!!!!!!!!!!!


First time in the history it has happened....!
Rajnikant vs Nalia.
Question to both in a competition.
What is half of 8?
Rajni: 4
Nalia: Depend karta hai ....
agar horizontally half karo to ''0'' or vertically karo to ''3''
Rajnikant still unconcious...!!!


Nalia bhatt: Hey dad, what plans for weekend ?
Nahesh bhatt: Income Tax Returns.
Nalia bhatt: Hey first part kab release hua tha?
Nahesh bhatt:  Jaa meri ma, tu shooting pe ja!!!


100 metre ki race ho rahi thi...
Referee said '1,2,3 GO!'...
Everybody started running except Nalia bhatt.
Referee - Y r u not running...?
Nalia - My number is 4 !!!



SBI Bank: Humara bank aapko bina interest ke loan de raha hai....
Nalia bhat: Agar dene mein interest hi nahi hai to kyu de rahe ho? Nahi chahiye....
Once there was a mirror that killed anyone who lied...
FRENCH : I think I dont smoke (died).
AMERICAN : I think I love my wife (died).
Nalia BHATT: I think.. (died)


Nalia bhatt and varun dhawan are walking on a road, and they find a 1000 rupee note lying down.
Nalia - What should we do now?
Varun- We'll take 50:50.
Nalia- What about the remaining 900?
Nalia Bhatt: Let's go for movie.
Varun: Shit, I've got a doctor's appointment today..
Nalia Bhatt: Just cancel it,Tell him you're sick.

Nalia reading newspaper..
News:
"Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump"
ANalia comments:
Idiot !!
Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping!!!

Deepika Padukone : I have more Fans than You..
Nalia Bhatt: No Big deal, I have AC at Home.

============================

Parents

A long time ago, there was a huge apple tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it every day. He climbed to the treetop,

ate the apples, and took a nap under the shadow. He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him.

Time went by, the little boy had grown up and he no longer played around the tree every day.

One day, the boy came back to the tree and he looked sad.

“Come and play with me”, the tree asked the boy.

Boy: “I am no longer a kid, I do not play around trees anymore” the boy replied. “I want toys. I need money to buy them.”

Tree: “Sorry, but I do not have money, but you can pick all my apples and sell them. So, you will have money.”

The boy was so excited. He grabbed all the apples on the tree and left happily. The boy never came back after he picked the apples. The tree was sad.

One day, the boy who now turned into a man returned and the tree was excited.

“Come and play with me” the tree said.

“I do not have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?”

“Sorry, but I do not have any house. But you can chop off my branches to build your house.” So the man cut all the branches of the tree and left happily.

The tree was glad to see him happy but the man never came back since then. The tree was again lonely and sad.

One hot summer day, the man returned and the tree was delighted.

“Come and play with me!” the tree said.

“I am getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?” said the man.

“Use my trunk to build your boat. You can sail far away and be happy.”

So the man cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and never showed up for a long time.

Finally, the man returned after many years.

“Sorry, my boy. But I do not have anything for you anymore. No more apples for you”, the tree said.

“No problem, I do not have any teeth to bite” the man replied.

Tree : “No more trunk for you to climb on.”

“I am too old for that now” the man said.

“I really cannot give you anything, the only thing left is my dying roots,” the tree said with tears.

“I do not need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years,” the man replied.

“Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest, come sit down with me and rest.” The man sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears.

 This is a story of everyone. The tree is like our parents. When we were young, we loved to play with our Mum and Dad.

When we grow up, we leave them; only come to them when we need something or when we are in trouble.

No matter what, parents will always be there and give everything they could just to make you happy.

You may think the boy is cruel to the tree, but that is how all of us treat our parents.

We take them for granted; we don’t appreciate all they do for us, until it’s too late.

~ Moral ~
Treat your parents with loving care…. For you will know their value, when you see their empty chair…

We never know the love of our parents for us; till we have become parents

Click here for more such jokes collections

Like this , Share Facebook Twitter WhatsApp Telegram LinkedIn Pinterest Reddit ✉ E-Mail